Girls wearing short skirts and prosthetic limbs become popular: accepting yourself will make them happier

May 19th, Xie Renren, a girl who likes to wear skirts, always smiles and greets classmates when she meets them.

On May 18, before the make-up examination for the Civil Law Examination, Xie Renren was taking the time to read.

Xie Renren has ear-length hair and loves to laugh. She walks very fast, her right leg barely bends, and the blue metal prosthetic frame under her short skirt swings forward with inertia.

At noon on May 17, she was wearing a short skirt and passing by a hotel lobby near Southwest University of Political Science and Law. An obstetrician and gynecologist saw her and covered his mouth in surprise.

The girl in front of the doctor is the same as the girl in the popular Weibo post. Her right leg is equipped with a "removed prosthetic limb" and she is also a student at Southwest University of Political Science and Law. The mole next to the corner of the mouth rises and falls with a smile.

After confirming that Xie Renren was the "amputation girl" on Weibo, they took a photo together and left each other's contact information. A week ago, the obstetrician and gynecologist performed a fetal examination on a pregnant woman and found that the fetus had inverted feet. After struggling for a long time, he suggested that the fetus should be removed. Later, I saw Xie Renren’s Weibo and forwarded it to the mother, asking her to think about it again.

After parting ways, Xie Renren shared this chance encounter with three friends. She was a little moved and her voice trembled slightly, "For the first time, I felt that I was really useful."

"The Sun of Western Government"

On May 12, she was invited by a friend on Zhihu to answer a question - "What would happen if I wore a short skirt and exposed the prosthetic legs on both legs while walking on the street?"

One night, the number of likes for her answer exceeded 5,000, and later increased to more than 26,000. Her Weibo was found, and her fans increased from 200 to more than 20,000. Some people commented that she was "the sun of Western politics".

She doesn't like this title, "What the sun, it's just bringing shame to her alma mater." She doesn't want to become an inspirational model, she just wants to tell her own story.

Three years ago, she was admitted to the School of Law of Southwest University of Political Science and Law. Going to college in this city known as a "mountain city", she had to climb nearly 200 stairs, climb several hills, and rest four or five times during her first class.

In the first year of school, she fell all the time. Whenever it rained, her wounds hurt so much that she could hardly go out. This short-haired girl skipped class for the first time in college because she collapsed halfway up the hill. She called her friend and cried, "I'm just too tired."

Nowadays, the classmates who walk with her are always not as fast as her. Xie Renren is as fast as she can, "because walking abrades the wounds, and I want to shorten the painful time as much as possible."

Xie Renren grew up in an unsatisfactory family - her father got into fights and was beaten so much that he had to "stuff his intestines into his stomach" and spent many years in jail; in a car accident, her mother became disabled like her. In her memory, for a long time, her family ate noodles every day. She asked her mother why, and her mother coaxed her because the noodles were delicious.

When he first entered college, his mother could not raise the tuition fees, so Xie Renren applied for a scholarship for poor students, which was 2,500 yuan per year. In her sophomore year, after her family's financial situation could support her normal life, she never applied again.

This girl who always said that she became slack after going to college has high standards for herself. Last year, she failed in three subjects, all with scores around 75, and she chose to retake them all.

Xie Renren’s praised fitness photo on Zhihu was accidentally taken by a friend. In the school gym, she has prosthetic legs specially used for fitness. They are heavier than usual, and she will sweat profusely after riding an exercise bike.

An associate professor once met her by chance in the gym and posted a special post on Moments: I saw a little girl in the gym today. She was wearing a prosthetic leg on one leg and was constantly trying various fitness equipment... I asked her, why are you pushing dumbbells? The 20-year-old girl grinned and said loudly that she wanted to prevent her breasts from sagging.

On May 20, Xie Renren practiced balance in the gym.

On May 19, citizens passing by gave thumbs up and applauded to express their gratitude for mercy.

On May 19, Xie Renren selected the books he needed in the library.

Car accident

On March 21, 2001, in Qiannan Buyi and Miao Autonomous Prefecture, Guizhou Province, Xie Renren, wearing a skirt and red leather shoes, went out to play with her mother. When she walked to the door of a clinic, she saw a doctor giving injections to others. She was frightened and turned around and ran away. With the sound of brakes and her mother's shouts, the little girl, who had just entered kindergarten, was swept under the bus.

When she opened her eyes, she saw the dark, intertwined parts and pipes at the bottom of the car. Her nose was filled with the smell of fuel, the steam was steaming, and her face was very hot.

There was no pain in the memory of the car accident. She only remembered that she had her eyes open blankly. When she was dragged out of the car, there was a middle-aged man on the bus looking down. The man's hair was very short. Sixteen years later, the indifference in the man's expression is still unforgettable.

Her mother was also hit by a car while trying to pull her away. In this car accident, the daughter lost her right leg and the mother lost her left leg.

On the way to the hospital by taxi, Xie Renren looked down and saw his right leg. From the knee down, yellow, cyan, and red were intertwined, and the meridians, blood vessels, and flesh were entangled and dangling.

My mother couldn't stop crying. She clearly remembered the taxi driver saying in dialect, "Don't drip blood on my car hood."

The mother did not refute, but hugged her and kept chanting, "Baby, you must study hard." Xie Renren was only 4 years old at the time of the car accident. At that time, this little Miao girl could run and jump, and was chosen by her classmates to be a "campus anchor."

After the car accident, she stayed in the hospital for three months. Her mother lived on the sixth floor and she lived on the fifth floor. My mother, who loves to wear high heels, always has nightmares. She dreams of the doctor saying on the operating table, "This saw is not working fast. I need to use scissors to cut it." Then she wakes up, crying, and wants to jump off the sixth floor.

Xie Renren knew that his mother was sad. After getting the injection every morning, he would move the small bench, put his left leg on the ground, support it with both hands, and jump to the sixth floor step by step, bumping and bumping, to find his mother.

"I didn't comfort her, I just ran to her side and clung to her, heels and heels."

One night, her mother looked at her lying beside the bed and said to herself, "I must spend all my time with my child to help her grow up."

Within two years, her mother taught her to read Pinyin, learn Chinese characters, and memorize multiplication tables before 7:30 every day. If she couldn't recite them, she would be beaten. Before she entered elementary school, Xie Renren could already memorize first-grade texts from the first lesson to the last lesson.

It is difficult for children with disabilities to attend ordinary schools. The mother is begging for help, using a cane, asking one school a day, "Can my daughter go to school?" There is a bridge next to the Xie family's old house. Xie Renren waits for his mother to come home by the bridge every evening, watching his mother come back again and again with her head lowered.

"The school doesn't want you, so why don't we stop studying?"

"Mom, I want to study. Please let me study. I...I will definitely get into Harvard." When he heard that he could not study, Xie Renren burst into tears. The mother also cried, "Okay, mom will ask again."

Later, a primary school principal agreed to take Xie Renren in, and her mother set up her home near the school. As soon as it was time to get out of school, her mother would wait for her on the road and stipulate to Xie Renren: You must go home when the time comes. If you don't come back, I will beat you.

The beatings were severe, and her grandmother called her a "stepmother." Her mother never argued, "Now that I can, I will. I'm afraid that she will follow in her father's footsteps." Every time her daughter was beaten, her mother would cry.

Prosthesis and self-esteem

After the car accident, Xie Renren felt that he was "different" and wrapped himself in a thick shell.

In the second grade, she was playing catch-up with the children in the yard. She ran too fast and the prosthetic leg flew out. All the children started crying and dispersed. She crawled over to pick up the prosthetic leg and limped home.

She is getting stronger and stronger. A boy nearby called her "Cripple" and "Tieguai Li", so she started a fight with them in the vegetable field, a "fight between trapped beasts". Even though the other person bit her hand, she still made the other person's nose bleed.

From then on, the boys nearby called her "Sister Mercy", and Xie Renren became the "One Dominant of Sandaohe" in Guizhou.

For a long time, her life creed has been: Life is already very difficult, how can I still live if I still remember that others have treated me badly? She had almost forgotten all those so-called "hurt stories".

What impressed me most was her sophomore year in high school, when she was the class president and her classmates were preparing for the "campus dance". She was reading in the library. "No one asked me if I could dance. They all thought I couldn't dance."

That day, she sat in the library, hearing the singing of the campus dance, and cried.

In more than ten years, she has never worn shorts and kept her prosthetic limbs in a dark place, "hiding them as deeply as possible." At that time, she cared about other people's opinions and was always cautious, fearing that her prosthetic limb would fall off and her self-esteem would be shattered along with it.

When she meets people around her, she will always say "I like you so much". A friend commented that she is good at observing people's behavior and "wags her tail when she sees everyone" in order to protect herself.

When she was struggling emotionally, she read like crazy, reading Zhou Guoping, Yu Qiuyu, Kant, Rousseau, and Sartre.

There was only one year left before the college entrance examination, and Xie Renren's mock test score was only over 400 points. She felt the urgency, "Everyone said that I would become a gangster like my dad. I want to prove it.

"Born as an ant, yet as beautiful as a god"

In his senior year of high school, Xie Renren went to school every morning to study English at seven o'clock in the morning. He would lie down on the table to rest for a while at noon and then get up to read. He did not go home until the school lights were turned off at eleven o'clock in the evening.

At that time, she was very poor in math. Every time she finished her math test, she would call her mother and cry. Her mother always said: "It doesn't matter, mom believes in you." ”

In the year of the college entrance examination, she scored 627 points, an improvement of more than 200 points in one year, and came to study law at Southwest University of Political Science and Law as she wished. Everyone thinks that Xie Renren is a "dark horse in the college entrance examination", and my mother knows in her heart that "it's all a result of hardship."

In the summer after finishing the exam, she started from Guizhou alone, passed through Yunnan, and entered Tibet. Along the way, she stayed in youth hostels, hitchhiked, met many people, and gradually opened up about herself. In the forum of Southwest University of Political Science and Law, this girl who had been depressed for many years tried to post her own photos and write down what she saw and felt along the way.

During a heavy rainstorm, Xie Renren and the fellow travelers he met by chance asked others to take shelter from the rain, but they were all rejected.

Finally, an old man who guarded the temple took them in. This old man has no nose, and there are only hideous pits where there should be a nose. He also has no lips, and his throat only buzzes when he speaks, which is not clear.

At that time, Xie Renren was soaked through and her backpack was dripping. The old man took out his clothes and danced for her to put them on. She remembered that life is precious, "Born as an ant, but beautiful as a god." ”

After entering university, Xie Renren claimed to be "a great thinker". She began to make friends and went to Xinjiang and Tibet again. She also met her boyfriend Gao Qifeng, who is also a disabled person and is an undergraduate student at MIT.

After Gao Qifeng lost his right hand, he spent a lot of money to get a bionic prosthesis made in the UK. He would put on gloves every time after wearing the prosthesis. Later, he no longer wanted to endure those quiet "looks" and stopped covering up and covering up. He became a "pirate captain" with a metal hook on his right hand.

During that time, Xie Renren gradually became more confident and self-aware. She wrote in her diary: The long period of self-awareness and recognition is like a long-distance run. You are always out of breath, always want to give up, and you can’t see the end. But I believe that when we adjust our breathing and heart rate, it becomes a wonderful and enjoyable challenge.

The day before Gao Qifan returned to China, Xie Renren was wearing prosthetic legs in a shopping mall to try on pants. Her left leg was thick and her right leg was thin. The salesperson kept looking at her secretly. She could not forget the cautious and hesitant look in her eyes.

At that moment, she exploded: Hiding and still getting discovered, what's the point of hiding like this? When I got back to the hotel, I tore off the outer packaging of the prosthetic limb, leaving only the metal torso, and cut off the right trouser leg, "going out on a date openly."

Stand up and speak out

After tearing off the packaging of the prosthetic limb, Xie Ren became a "disabled person under the sun". She enjoys the rights that people with disabilities deserve. She no longer has to worry about a young man playing with a mobile phone sitting in a special seat, and she feels confident entering the bathroom for disabled people.

She is increasingly willing to reveal herself and share her photos and texts on social networks.

The night after answering the question on Zhihu, Xie Renren stayed up all night. He watched the number of likes increase little by little and read more than 3,000 comments. The most common keyword in the comments was: cool.

She admitted that she would be happy when others praised her for being cool. This girl who loves to wear lipstick has been a "stinky beauty" since she was a child. But this was not her original intention. More, she hoped that others could see beyond the photos and see the existence of the disabled community.

In the past, Xie Renren's goals for himself were to improve his grades, take the TOEFL exam, study abroad, and realize his childhood dream of "going to Harvard." Now it has become "to stand up. The first step is to let others know about this group, and then think about fighting for rights."

This kind of "standing out" stems from a sense of responsibility. She repeatedly emphasized that she could be a "vested person" - quietly enjoy the fruits of years of study, study for a Ph.D. in this well-known political and law university, or become a lawyer after graduation, and have a decent future according to the secular definition.

Just thinking about her mother's running around trying to get herself into an ordinary school when she was a child makes her feel sad for other people with disabilities. "As a child who is missing a leg, it is so difficult for me to go to ordinary schools. What should we do about those children who have no legs and cannot see?"

When it comes to the future, Xie Renren has bright eyes. She wants to make her story into a documentary and a brochure for children, so that they can know from an early age that children with disabilities are as lovely as herself. Don't classify them as "others", but regard "them" as "us".

As for who to shoot the documentary? Where do the funds come from? She is slowly implementing these things, but she is also confused and worried about her abilities. "But having passion is better than nothing."

In May, on an afternoon that was about to rain, Xie Renren was exercising in the gym.

Wearing a prosthetic leg made by Gao Qifan himself, she was speeding on a spinning bike, listening to music and shaking her hair, riding faster than the people next to her.

Suddenly, she burst out laughing—the prosthetic leg fell off.

Xie Renren moved skillfully, picked up the prosthetic leg with his right hand, put it on, stepped on it firmly, said "it's okay", and got back on the bicycle in a blink of an eye. (Written by/Beijing News reporter Luo Qian, Chongqing report, Photography/Beijing News reporter Peng Ziyang)